Better late than never?

You know those people who always arrive places at least 30 minutes early? Those people who hate being late so much, the mere idea of lateness makes them break into a cold sweat?

Yeah, those people are annoying. But only because I wish I could be more like them.

In terms of my overall life track record, I think I'm about average when it comes to punctuality. I'm not the one who can be counted on to be on time, all the time. But I'm also not the person who is so chronically late that other people give me event start times that are actually 30 minutes earlier than the real start time. I'd say, on average, my punctuality falls in the range of "on time to 10 minutes late."

Lately, however, I feel like I have been running later and later. This, of course, is due to the fact that I'm raising a toddler. Like all toddlers, he has trouble with transitions. So when I say it's time to put on our shoes and head out to some interesting, enriching activity I have signed up for just for his benefit, he throws a tantrum because he wants to stay and play with his plastic toys at home. And then when he's finally willing to put on his shoes, he doesn't want to wear those shoes. And he wants to bring a toy, which takes him 10 minutes to pick out. And then he walks as slowly as he can to his carseat, and then he wants to buckle his Pooh in before buckling himself in, and oops, let me pick out a CD, and ... oh, you know the drill.

And then we're late for toddler music class, and we miss the Hello Song, and the teacher stops whatever she is doing when we come in and says, "Let's go back and say hello to Nathan." And I'm embarrassed, because this happens every week, and somehow all the other parents of toddlers seem to get there on time. 

We're always late to my classes at the gym.  I have a total of seven classes that I attend at the gym, and I've never been there for the warm-up in a single class. 

In the grand scheme of things, it's not big deal.  It's not like anybody cares if you miss a few minutes of toddler music class, and it's not like the gym is going to cancel my membership because I'm not on time to the group fitness classes. 

The main threat of lateness is to my sanity.  I get so stressed out when we are late.  And it's a stress that could be prevented. 

I can blame my son for our lateness, but in actuality it's my fault for not allowing extra time for toddler shenanigans.  I should know that we're going to hit some kind of snag in our efforts to get out the door, and schedule extra time to get places.  Maybe it's because I'm still a rookie at this parenting thing, but I tend to think I still plan my schedule as though I'm not toting an unreasonable little person along with me.  You know, I assume that the "head out the door time" and the "pull out of the driveway time" are the same time. 

Yes, I can hear you laughing right now. 

So, lately I have been experimenting with the extremely dorky activity of writing out my entire day's schedule the night before, with extra time padded in to allow for whatever ridiculous perils my son puts me through. For example, if we have to be somewhere at 10:00, and it takes 10 minutes to get there, I do not assume we will just up and leave at 9:50 with no problems.  Instead, I note on my schedule that I will take a shower at 9:00, start getting ready to leave at 9:30, and pull out of the driveway at 9:50.

It's too soon to tell if my "time flow chart" method will be the solution to all of my punctuality problems.  (The term "time flow chart" is credited to my extremely well-organized stepmom, who may not be the one who made it up.)  But I think I'm on the right track in terms of thinking about time in a more reasonable way.  At least until the day when I decide to throw another child into the mix. 

Original Chicago Moms Blog Post.  Shannon also writes for Chicagonista and Same Old Shannon.